I'm thankful I no longer have goats.
I'm thankful my wife doesn't kill me when I miss trash day.
I'm thankful for cornbread and cast iron skillets.
I'm thankful the grass has stopped growing because I really hate mowing.
I'm thankful for good old fashioned guacamole -- without peas!
I'm thankful my toilets flush when it's rainy.
I"m thankful my old grandpa isn't around to see the mess we've gotten ourselves into.
I'm thankful my phone has an off switch.
I'm thankful the neighbor's dog finally stopped barki...
Damn. Spoke too soon.