Saturday, March 27, 2010

I am NOT a blogger!

Let me just set one thing straight right here and now -- I am NOT a blogger. I am a writer who chooses to publish little stories using a program used by bloggers. But that does NOT make me a blogger.

I am NOT a blogger!
A "blogger" is a person who writes about how they feel, what they think, how they perceive the world, how they think others perceive how they perceive the world, and a fair amount of angst-filled paragraphs that other bloggers read, make comments about, and then link to, Tweet about, Digg up, and so on and so on, using a blogging "platform" because that's a whole lot easier to do than to create a website from scratch using HTML.

I am not a blogger!

Bloggers enjoy sharing their inner-most feelings with total strangers; they describe the minutia of their every-day life as if the rest of us don't have our own minutia; they rant and rave about this subject and that subject; and then they ask how YOU feel about the matter, please leave a comment, and spread the word to all your friends and neighbors about my site because what I have to say is really worth it, and I love you!

I am not a blogger!

Blogs can also be websites put out by individuals or companies who want to inform you about what it is they are expert at, because they know you also want to be an expert about it, and if you follow this formula, or these 10 steps, or buy this product for just $39.95, then you'll be well on your way to producing the same results they do, and your life will be much fuller and complete, and when you die you'll die with the knowledge that you made something out of your life, and you weren't just another bum like your Uncle Isaac who sunk all his money into a new kind of engine oil that was supposed to "transform the industry," but instead transformed his banking account to negative numbers, and that's why he left Aunt Sally (because she was pissed, let me tell ya!), and went to Mexico with a pole dancer named Cinnamon who he met online.

I am not a blogger!

I am a writer. I write stories. Stories that serve no other purpose than to entertain. I have nothing to teach you, I have no 10 rules for gaining entrance to Valhala, and I have absolutely no desire to share the feelings that I'm feeling right now, because they're none of your business, and you'd gain nothing from learning that I had a really crappy day and if I have another one like it anytime soon, I'll lose my freakin' mind and have to do a fair amount of bodily damage to anyone standing in close proximity to my fists.

I am not a blogger!

But please pass this on to your friends and neighbors because I think they'll enjoy it -- especially since it's free!

Oh, and please leave a comment. Thank you!

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