Thursday, March 11, 2010

Why Am I Here? Beats Me!

Some people will tell you that you cannot live a fulfilled and happy life without contemplating the meaning of your existence and discovering your purpose for being on this planet. And I say Hogwash! We can live quite happily without ever knowing why we're here and what we're supposed to do. In fact, even giving it a thought can really screw up a day.

I am here on this planet to consume copious amounts of chips and hot sauce, to constantly live life on the edge of peril, and to make my fellow human beings thankful that they're not as poor as me.

I’m here to provide my goats with food and shelter, to never say an unkind word to my co-workers unless their backs are turned, and to spend my money as I see fit even if it means I have to eat beans for a week or two.

I’m here to raise my kids so they can support themselves and never come back asking for money, to shoot and eat as many squirrels as I can, and to play banjo until the neighbors complain,

I’m here to put as many miles on my motorcycle as is humanly possible, to eat my fair share of Homemade Vanilla Ice Cream, and to never begin a sentence with, “I was watching Oprah the other day and ...”

Other than that, nothing else matters.

Are you ready to Live Without Oprah?

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