All I want for Christmas is ...

Hello dear readers. Time once more for another 700 words of mostly-pure wisdom. But this week I’m going to make it short and sweet because I’m right in the middle of reading a book and it’s getting to the good part.

books in a stack (a stack of books)
What’s a book, you say? Haven’t read one in ages, you say? Don’t have to time to sit down and read a book when there are so many other fun things to do, like watching TV or playing video games, you say?

Holy cow, you have a lot to say, don’t you?

Yes, I like to read books, and I see nothing wrong in doing so. Okay, so sometimes I read books when I should be doing other things (like mowing the yard, washing the car, taking out the trash), but that’s neither here nor there, and maybe we should just leave it at that.

You see, reading works the brain, puts it through its paces, makes it do jumping jacks so it doesn’t get flabby in its old age. Of course sitting around reading all day means your brain is the only thing that’s fit enough to do pushups, but hey, you’ve got to start somewhere, right?

“Harold, you need to put that book down and do some work around here. I’m not your maid, you know.”

“I am working, Maud. I’m working my brain. Shoot, when I’m 75, I’ll have the healthiest brain in town.”

“If you don’t get your lazy bottom off that couch and help me with this trash, you won’t make it to 75. You might not even make it to tomorrow.”

MORAL: There is a time for reading, and there is a time for doing exactly what’s expected of you without question. Choose correctly, and you’ll live to read another day.

Speaking of digital e-readers (I know – I wasn’t talking about them, but now I am, so keep your shirt on), I love the thought of digital e-readers because they’re cool, they’re hip, they’re now. You can store a gazillion novels on one, take it on your next trip to your Aunt Edna’s who lives in El Paso, and when the “old folks” start talking about whatever they like to talk about, you can whip it out and be knee-deep in Stephen King or Sherlock Holmes in the wink of an on/off switch.

(Do you know how much a gazillion hardback or paperback novels would weigh if you put them all in the back of your Ford F-150 and tried to haul them out to El Paso? Me neither. Sorry I asked.)

The only downside to digital novels is you miss out on the actual “feel” of a book; the swishing of pages, the ease of dog-earing a corner so you don’t lose you place. Just try dog-earing a Kindle and see how much that will cost you to get repaired, bucko.

But the times they are a changing. One day, our children’s children will come across a book in paper form and look at it with awe, never imagining that a book could come in any form but digital. Actually, that reminds me of a child of mine (can’t remember which) who was shocked to find out that Solitaire could be played with a real-live deck of cards.

Anyways, reading is fun in my opinion, and I’m thinking, “If only I had an e-reader, such as a an iPad, then I could carry books with me all the time, exercise my brain, do something more worthwhile than watching TV. And since it is getting close to Christmas, and I haven’t made out my Christmas list yet, maybe I should mention again that I could really put an iPad to good use if there just so happened to be one under the Christmas tree with my name on it. Yes I could.”

Well, that’s about all I have to say about the subject. Got to get back to my book. My analog book. My analog book that would be so much easier to carry around if I only I had an iPad. And since I’ve been a pert-near good boy this year, I can’t think of a single reason why I shouldn’t get one.

So what do you say, Santa? Hmmmm?

Comments

  1. I've been leery of the electronic readers, mostly because I've had laptops bite the big one and lost all my stuff off of them. Plus I really hated that Kindle commercial with the little song and the lady who kept changing clothes during it. Perhaps I'm just being too old fashioned, what with my advanced age and all. I have the feeling this is going to be one of those things for me, where I'm one of the last people to do it, and when I finally do. I'm all like...OMG, why did no one TELL me??? But you DID! So now I have no excuse. You can play Solitare without a deck of cards?

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