Wednesday, July 31, 2013

Sweet Tea in a Mason Jar

I don’t see how it matters what TV shows I watch,
Don’t matter what clothes I got.
Can’t see how the car I drive,
can make me look more alive.

I don’t care who likes me on the Internet.
Don’t feel the urgent need to spend all I get.
Johnny Depp surely has it all,
or maybe more, I can't recall.

But I don’t keep up with the trends,
don’t worry ‘bout the stars.
I’m just a tall sweet tea in a mason jar kinda guy.

Looking for a girl in a cowboy hat,
who doesn’t give a lick about all that fancy stuff,
and who wants to be
riding the trails
with a guy like me.

I’d rather spend my day on the porch than at the mall.
Fancy restaurants don’t thrill me at all,
Grilling burgers is all right by me,
Don’t have to tip no maĆ®tre d

‘Cause I don’t keep up with the trends,
Don’t worry about the stars.
I’m just a tall sweet tea in a mason jar kinda guy.

Looking for a girl in a cowboy hat,
who doesn’t give a lick about all that fancy stuff,
and who wants to be
riding the trails
with a guy like me.

Hollywood picture shows,
internet Romeos,
look around, no one knows
if they’re alive, and maybe
they should have everything,
fancy cars, diamond rings,
plug it in, watch the stream
only contrived of
things that go away,
when their connections begin to fade.

But I don’t keep up with the trends,
Don’t worry about the stars.
I’m just a tall sweet tea in a mason jar kinda guy.

Looking for a girl in a cowboy hat,
who doesn’t give a lick about all that fancy stuff,
and who wants to be
riding the trails
with a guy like me.

Saturday, July 27, 2013

On the trail at Tyler State Park

Whenever my family would go camping, me, dad, mom and brother Scott would head out to Tyler State Park.

We'd pitch a tent in the Sumac Bend camping area, swing on the vines, hike, fish and eat more hot dogs and beans than any person should.

Tyler State ParkYou know, things that families should do.

So it was just natural that our next hiking trip -- my daughter and I -- would head out to Tyler to visit old stomping grounds.

On this visit, we hiked the park's Nature Trail, the trailhead being right near the park's entrance. The park has longer trails, but we're saving those for when it gets cooler.

Speaking of -- when we started on down the trail, the temperature, humidity, and the breezes were just perfect, but as we descended down the path and into the woods, it got so humid that one of my camera lenses fogged up.

And I hate foggy lenses.

Anyways, it was an enjoyable short little hike, just long enough to clear the cobwebs from our brains and talk about the future, the past, and to wish we were elves making our way back home to Rivendell.

Tyler State Park -- we'll be back.

Tyler leaves



Friday, July 26, 2013

Do moths actually fly?

Moth in the Bushes

Of course not! They just tumble around in the air until they can grasp hold of something.

They're sort of like helicopters that lose part of their propellors in all those movies you've ever seen that include helicopter crashes. Up, down, turn left, right, back up, go around, do-si-do and grab your partner, swing her boy, swing all night.

Except moths don't blow up when they crash.

I was lucky to grab this photo when the poor thing was taking a breather.

So, here are five things I think a moth is thinking about when he's up there doing gymnastics in the air:

1. Holy Cow, I wish I were a cow.

2. Okay, I can do this, just look straight ahead, aim for the tree, where's the tree? Oh God it disappeared. No wait, there it is.

3. What? No peanuts on this flight?

4. Ladies and gentleman, we're experiencing a SLIGHT bit of turbulence. It's possible we will crash land in Mr. Farmer's field. Either that or we'll be plucked out of the sky by a hungry Purple Martin looking for an afternoon snack. Either way, we're DOOMED. Thank you for flying ME.

And finally...

5. I could have been a doctor.

Ya want some MORE random facts? Head on over to A Rural Journal.

Saturday, July 20, 2013

My 'interview' with Texas Senator Wendy Davis

The Texas Hoss
Actually, it was more like me asking questions and hoping that she'd see them.

And then reply via my "The Texas Hoss" Twitter account.

I know, a long shot.

A VERY long shot.

But, if dreamers never dreamed their dreams, they'd have eight hours of uninterrupted sleep and would never have the experience of waking up and ALMOST remembering what the hell it was they were dreaming about, but only just.

So, being a former journalist, I thought I'd throw caution to the wind, as well as my questions, then step back to see what happened.

Of course I didn't ask questions that all the OTHER journalists were asking. That would be pert near stupid.

"Ms. Davis, how do you feel about abortion rights?" "Ms. Davis, will you run for governor?" "Ms. Davis, rumor has it you're vegan, but you ate an egg before your now-famous filibuster, so what's the story?"

All easy questions that any dunder-headed, cub reporter could come up with.

Me? Now I'm different.

I asked her "important" things like, "Do you eat your chili WITH beans, or without?"

(See how I'm really asking two questions at once? If she eats chili, she ain't vegan. If she eats it with beans, she's a mislead Texan. Oh, and by the way, I have nothing against people who prefer to not consume meat. It's a personal choice, and I am pro-choice, which doesn't mean I would choose that lifestyle for myself, but to each his own.)

My questions were geared toward finding the TRUE Wendy beneath the official Senator Davis. Questions like: How many boots do you own; Would you grab a burger at Burger King or Whataburger; How many times a year do you go two-stepping; and after Christmas, do you take down your outside Christmas lights or do you just leave them up all year round?

Questions that get to the very heart of the REAL question which is, "Would I vote for this person if she ever ran for governor of Texas?"

So did she ever answer?


Wendy Davis would make a FINE Texas Governor, and I'll keep saying it until I'm blue in the state.

'nuff said!

Friday, July 19, 2013

Five good reasons for owning a boat

Sunset Pier

I'm probably the only person I know who lives pretty close to a lake but doesn't own a boat. In some communities, that would make me a heretic.

Not wanting to be thought unkindly of, here are five random mostly-true facts I used on my wife to try and convince her we needed a boat.

1. People who own boats are sexier than other people, and we need all the help we can get.

2. Boat ownership is a pathway to a healthier lifestyle because we'd fish more, and eating fish is good for you.

3. Boating is referenced all throughout the Bible. If it's good enough for God, it's good enough for us.

4. Johnny Depp was in a pirate movie. Pirates had boats. You love Johnny Depp. Having a boat would be like having our own little cosmic connection to Johnny Depp.

5. A boat would give me somewhere to sleep so you wouldn't have to hear me snore.

(That last one brought a smile to her face.)

There's a boatload of random facts over at A Rural Journal.

Friday, July 12, 2013

Random 5 Friday

A Green Something

I have no idea what kind of plant/flower/weed this is, but here are 5 Random Facts I DO know:

1. Sometimes I have to mow.

Mostly when my wife or neighbors complain.

2. Mowing gives me time to think, to contemplate the universe.

3. I think about how much I hate driving in circles cutting grass.

4. Sometimes I come across a flower or weed that I think is just too interesting to mow, and I stop to take a photo of it.

5. Once I stop, I stop for good.

You can find a lot more RANDOM 5-ness at A Rural Journal.

Friday, July 5, 2013

Doodling on hold

Today marked a momentous occasion for my family: I disconnected the land line, making us an all-mobile family.

It just seemed the right thing to do. Why spend $40 a month for a phone line that when it rings, we just look at it and don't answer?

But to give credit where credit is due, AT&T gave us years and years of adequate service, and I will miss our number. The only complaint I have with them is that they made it just too darn hard to disconnect.

Hard to find information about HOW to disconnect; hard to find a number to call TO disconnect; and when I finally found the number and called, I was put on hold for what seemed like forever.

(Can't really blame them, but it was still annoying.)

Let me try to illustrate how long I was actually on hold:

Whenever I'm put on hold, if a piece of scrap paper and pencil are anywhere near, I like to doodle. I draw houses, cars, airplanes, anything that comes to mind. Mostly houses.

I was on hold for so long, I drew a house with yard, fence, trees, smoke coming out of the chimney, a swing set, dog house, a German Shepherd, two-car garage, driveway, basketball goal, the neighbor's oak tree limb hanging over into our yard, Nick France the septic guy cleaning out our system, and a tool shed.

And then I started drawing the tools.

A Husky 8 in. Double Speed Adjustable Wrench; a Stanley 10 in. Fine-Finish Mini Utility Saw; a 6-piece Iron Bridge Tools Precision Screwdriver set; a Rockforge 10 lb Sledgehammer with Fiberglass Handle; and a Ryobi Tek4 Professional 4-Volt Infrared Thermometer.

I have no idea why I would ever need a Ryobi Tek4 Professional 4-Volt Infrared Thermometer, but it's better to be safe than sorry.

Finally, Sales Rep. Jennifer answered the call, said she hated to see us leave, but wished our family well and, "Remember, don't text and drive."

And that's it.

Our land line is dead.

Anybody that knew our number will never be able to call us on it again.

But I can live with that because in exchange, I have doodled a list of tools that I'll now be able to buy with my land-line savings.

Seems like a fair trade.

Thursday, July 4, 2013

Happy Fourth

I went out to take some fireworks photos.

This is the only one that I thought was half-way acceptable.

Not great, but workable.

I cropped it down to fill the frame, and that's when I saw what I actually had:

A dandelion glowing in the sky.

Happy Fourth!

Happy Fourth